07/09/08
it's been kinda quiet lately. I dunno, since i'm stuck at home now. until after pmr, i wanna watch wall-e!
So cute mannn :]

I've been thinking lately. About how people want to be known in every school, by every person for any cost.
I mean so what if you have 1000+ Friends. Do you have real friends? Surely you do right. unless you're somekind of tramp.
I've seen people who think they are so high above everyone just because people know them.
Bullshit.
I've known people who know they are better than everyone else.
Fucking shit.
I've been around people who actually say they are needed by everyone for they're own publisity
Dumb fuck.
I've loved people who are well-known but are humble.
So hard to find. So easy to love.

Sighh. I can say that I'm not even popular. Sure I know a number of people but they are friends not items used in a competition. I know the right people I want to hangout with :] Yeap and its all you people =P
I just want to meet for REAL people instead of this fake fucks going around talking shit.
I only know a few people who are actually genuine instead of plastic.
Hard to find people who actually know themselves well enough to introduce themselved to others [ as themselves]

09.09.08
i didnt get to say i love you more
So.. it's Tuesday. I cant wait for Friday. I love Fridays ;P
Friday & Friday & Friday & Fridayyyy~

I'm kinda getting tired to writting a blog. I mean, it's hard you know. I know people writing and reading plenty. haha like their lives revolve around their blog. it's their lifeee.

I'm actually watch tv now. there's this movie on about how a group of construction workers went to work one day and the building just dropped.
While they were on it. And a few of them were stuck under. And stucckkk. i mean like 5 tonne rock on their leg laaaa... hand nailed onto the ground kaahh.. all this la. and they only have prolly like 10 inches of space. vertically.
& they have to survive. Cause some of them regret the things they didnt do or say. It's really sad. Cause one guy was in a fight with his wife because of naming their kid. Alyssa or Olivia. why not Alyvia. hehe.
Both his legs were like blue black because his legs were under rocks. No blood flow of his legs. so yea lah. he got saved, told his wife, "i want to name the kid olivia for you". and they had another loverdovey arguement about it. ahaha

Second one is like. Nicolas Cage. When he was saved. he was like
"You kept me alive" to his wife

So So saddd.. i mean sweet lah. But it was in memory of the 9/11 la. not to forget our loved ones. bla2.
Kinda sad now. because of the movie. haha so sial kan. i mean, movies are so sad sometimes :(

My leg is better now. I mean i can walk properly. But my ankle is still hurting. So yalah. I have to like work it. hahah
I cant go down the stairs properly. Shit man.. its like one step at a time.

It's like I have this burden on my heart I cant shake off. I regret so much for taking the bike out. Now I'm living in fear. Whenever a car comes to close to the car... or we're too close to the curb.. My heart beats faster like panicing. Its fucking shitty. I hate it. Its like tearing me apart.
Not only the fact that I disobeyed my parents but also because I was trying to hide something that Im feeling.
Those who have siblings that left home to study would prolly understand better.

"I want to tell you that I'm sorry but it's eating me alive"

I just... I want to say that Im sorry but Its not enough. It will never be enough.

Not a fucking exam. Not some kind of display of medals. Not pages of paper. Not words.

I just dont know lahh... Getting depressed about it. Like I mean, People ask me about it and I dont like it. I just dont.
Sure it gives me attention but why the fuck would someone get hit by a car, risk getting killed or break a leg just for a publicity stunt.
WHY.

If any of my friends got hit by a car, I would visit them as often as I can. Just to keep them company.
Life isnt about friends or family. It's about us.
Yeah. Its all that. <3

16.09.08
I have a sudden urge to go sailing. i dunno. i used to sail last time when i was younger. and it was nice :D i mean.
get to shout at everyone at sea and they cant do anything about it except sail towards you. hahaha
or maybe cause the other day like terjumpa my dads friend and family and they sail and very active about the sea.
one of them even designs the rods my dad buys. like the expensive kind. yg 400 bucks per rod type. crazy kan.

Anyway. I'm doing my geography now. shit man. my exam right, i read it before but i forgot!! all the questions i read and the answers are sooo.... urgh. familiar. ahhaha crappyy mannn. oh well, studying like crazy now. ahah have to patch up my science too. & my maths.... my maths okay bah. kan???? :0

"close up camera #1. cause the hero sings in this scene.
The boy that gets the girl and go home and then get married" mayday parade - black cat

Life lately has been really....depressing. you know right, i now study like crazy at home and guess what.
Mi says i lost my colour. HAHAHA. damn. elaine says i lost weight.. Nadym says i'm the same like usual.
hahaha cant wait to go to the sea :P haha i mean like seriiiooously. i love the sea :D after PMR

who wants to go to the island with me?but you gotta know how to swim ok dumbass. hahaha and not okok in swimming. GOOD at swimming
haha. i cant wait i cant wait i cant waiiitt! :D

Hi guys, I dont think i have been updating much on this blog... oh well, You guys should check out my REAL blog instead of this. hahah cause, i dunno. this one is a "copy & paste" blog. except for THIS blog post lah. cause im explaining....
ANYWHOOO....
I just wanna paste some photos for people to see. i love my family very much, and I'd skin myself alive for them.
disgusting thought right? i dunno. I've been having this kind of thoughts since i was 10.

well. Today was a bad day. Well, its like ALMOST a bad day kind of day.
Everything was an almost-happened kinda thing.

1st happening.
i almost snapped at Cynthia today.
No stupid prefect that was involved in the teachers day thing but we still did our job. yeah we enjoyed it but they expect us to be the last minute people. We can do last minute work, but we cant do last minute rechecks.
So this was how it went at first...
Me : teacher, seranta has to go now. we have to pack up and leave
C : why? how come you're not staying?
Me : Nobody told us about this raptai!!we had to ask the prefects!

terus she diam this. I mean like prefects cant do ANYTHING without us seranta. But we seranta dont even have to be there. We dont gain anything or lose anything. We're neutral. Stupid oh =.=

2nd happening
The second happening was to another teacher. My piano teacher&some stuck snobs.

Do you think im a snob?
honestly tell me if i am. Cause the people in my piano lessons are WAY worse. Cause ..
Im a grade 6 student so there are some new things i would have to learn there.
So Im the only grade 6 in a room filled with grade 7&8.
So you get it lah, im the dumbest there. And i've only been to like 5 of these lessons and they expect me to be as smart as them. Bodoh assholes man.

So this was what happened..
Teacher : Karen im gonna ask you a lot of questions because you always gimmie all these strange answers.
Karen : oh. what to do *trip angry*
A : yeah Karen's favourite answer is 20th century!
20th century is a type of music that is strange and odd. very different on the ears.

So like the whole time i was angry lah. Like when people laughed im just kept quiet. When people were thinking, i was blank. But I had answers lah, but i dunno if its "strange"
Luckily, teacher was smart enough to see it and didnt make fun of me. So when they couldnt think of the correct answer i had it in my head but my face showed a blank face.
So teacher thought i was just sitting there, she asked me lah.

teacher : Karen since you're so dreamy whats the answer?
Karen : 4*correct answer for the Time signature*
then i got it correct and B claps. She got it wrong. =.=
I just wanted to snap when she wanted to ask me some questions. I would say, whats the point in asking me when im gonna get it wrong, teacher? you already know im so stupid kan.

Like you know, reverse psychology shyt.
I love doing it. No one has a come back. if its *YYEAH!!* or *now only you know?*
those are people who cant really think. they just think if they have a come back, they're safe. but it actually shows that you think you're like so much bigger than the other person. I call these people....
Blow jobs.

hahahahah russell peters baby.

Oh new song.
I love it.
mayday parade - 3 cheers for 5 years.